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im scared of a number - Printable Version

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im scared of a number - guidomista - 07-09-2018 04:44 PM

howdy!!

i've joined this forum because of an extremely obscure phobia.. most people who know about it aren't very understanding or kind about it, and those who are i still cant really talk about it with, because.. well, for one thing, i just feel guilty rambling to someone about something they can't relate to at all!
... so, im very eager to connect with people here! i hope to talk with yall soon!

i dont like even saying it's name, but i will for the purpose of this post. i'm terrified of the number four. it's called tetraphobia.

i'm 99% positive it's a symptom of OCD, i've had other obsessions in the past that faded away, and i've had this one for almost two years now.
how severe it is depends on the day, really! when i'm at my worst i count my steps, words, letters, and just about any other action there is to count, but no matter how bad i am, the immediate feeling of dread i get any time i see it never changes, and i REFUSE to have anything to do with it.. won't have four of something, won't eat that amount of things, won't take from groups of it, the list goes on and on.

i guess you could say i feel its "extremely bad luck", because it's just like the moment i see it, i assume everything or at least SOMETHING is going to go wrong from there, same for when i have that amount of something, or have taken from a group of that amount..
i've got a slight dislike for pretty much all even numbers, or numbers with multiple digits that i can add up to make 4.. such as 13 (1+3=), 22 (2+2=), 15 (5-1=), for example.. but the one that truly, really, DEEPLY scares me is. 4.

i felt a bit embarrassed when i saw it wasn't on the list of phobias for this site!! i know its obscure, though, so no hard feelings..
is anyone else afraid of any numbers??

(P.S., sorry if this post is confusing, with me switching between saying it and calling it "that amount", it's just kinda hard for me to make myself type it, even just having it in this post is making me worry it's gonna go badly.. so again, im so sorry if im screwing up!)