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petrified87 · 10-01-2011, 08:10 AM

Hi guys,

If you havent guessed from my username and subject title, Im new and im petrified of spiders.

Im so happy ive found this forum and had a chance to read some of the postings because I don't know anyone who is as terrified as I am. I do feel so alone sometimes, like no one understands.

I dont know how or when it started but I do know im fed up of being scared. Even when I can rationalize my fear, im still too terrified to confront it.

I've nearly crashed my car after finding a spider inside (while I was doing 80mph on the motorway), last year I literally scrubbed the skin off my neck after a big one crawled on me - worst experience ever. I was so hysterical.

I can never get on public transportation, or go to a friends house, or even get into bed without doing a thorough 'spider check' as I call them lol.

Im going travelling next year and I really want to see Australia, but i'm too scared to go and their spiders are immense! I don't even like to write or say the word.

I walked into my house 30mins ago and was confronted by one. I freaked out, fell on the way up the stairs and away from it and re-injured my wrist (I tore the ligaments two weeks ago). After crying for 20mins, I managed to wake up my parents to get it but it was already gone and now I cant sleep. As per usual, I will probably spend the whole night cleaning my room and double checking everywhere until I am either satisfied that its safe, or i get so exhausted I end up just passing out where ever. Either way, I cant live like this anymore.

my room is a sauna but Im too scared to sleep with the window open in case one comes in. I take showers at my aunts house down the road sometimes coz my bathroom always has spiders. I'm too scared to leave my room at night - even just to go to the bathroom - because its the only place I feel safe-ish. I sit in the same sofa in our living room because ive seen them on certain sofa's. Some nights im so paranoid I cant sleep.

I hate that they are not like dogs or cats that you can see/that make noise, I hate that they can fit into all kinds of spaces, I hate that you can just never see one coming, I hate that i carry a spider spray with me (even though i'd never be brave enough to use it lol) i hate that I keep a spare blanket in my car/dads car/sisters and brothers cars just in case i cant wake people up to get rid of a spider so I can at least sleep in the car.

Im just desperate to find a way to make this better. I dont think ill ever become their best friend or anything, but in an ideal world, I would love to at least be able to say their name out loud or maybe even be in a room with one and not jump or twitch with every move it makes.

Soul destroying.

Snooks · (This post was last modified: 10-01-2011 07:03 PM by Snooks.)

Hello Petrified87,

Welcome to Ofear and congratulations on being brave enough to admit that you have a problem and for being able to discuss it Smile

Many people suffer from a phobia all their life yet they cant admit that they have a problem and dont seek assistance. Im afraid that you are certainly going to need professional counselling and assistance because this phobia is imposing a burden on your day to day activities.

Have a read through some of the information on the site but i do urge you to visit a GP and have him refer you to a professional in this field.

Please drop by and chat because this can help......plus you can let us know how you are going Smile