What the title says
Add your own SA rant

My aunt in spain just called asking for my mum.
I got really nervous as always and my voice broke off in the middle of a sentence
"I'm noT reALly SURE whERe she IS" (capitals in a high pitched voice)
I hate when stuff like that happens!

Now that I think about it...I'm not even sure which aunt it was

This happened the other day, but whatever...

Well I was hiding out in my room cuz my sisters bf was over and definitely did not want to meet him...well anyways I said what the heck and decided I'd go get on the computer and act like I'm doing something and nobody will bother me...Then out of my sisters room come her and her bf, and the first thing I hear out of my dad's mouth "Have you met my son?"...I was like "NOOOOOOO!!!"...the idea was that I would get on the computer and not be bothered, instead of hiding out in my room like a chicken..so the dude walks over and shakes my hand and says "what's up man" of course I said nothing..lol...I HATE when people feel the need to make me meet people, if I wanted to meet him I would have introduced myself!!!

I hate stuff like that too.
Well I'm kinda ok with short introductions, I can stand saying "hi" and then run away into a corner . I just completely hate it if they try having small talk with you afterwards
I'm so lucky I don't have siblings, I wouldn't survive if they kept bringing partners and friends over

The guy who was supposed to deliver the bed is late...and now my parents left for work so I have to help him
I don't waant to

And as always I made a fool of myself.
yay

Last week, I took my 6 year old nephew to the arcade at the mall.
He was playing games where you can win tickets and redeem them for a prize.
When we went to the machine that counts your tickets and prints a receipt for you to redeem at the prize counter, none of the machines worked. I was already feeling put off by the situation. I told my nephew that I didnt know what to do. He does not have SP, so he pointed at an attendant across the room and said "GO ASK HER TO HELP US!"

She saw him pointing at her, so now she's looking at us. She starts to walk over and two other groups of people come up to use the ticket machines, so I tell them that the machines do not work.{I didn't want to say anything, but I knew that if I didn't say anything, they would realize that I knew the machines weren't working and didn't have the courtesy to inform them. I hate being forced to speak up!}

So the attendant gets to the machines and I tell her that none of them work, so she unlocks them and starts working on them. So now other people walk over to use the machine, so there is a line forming behind us. People are crowding closer to watch the girl work on the machines{people who stare at others who are working are a long rant for another time lolll}

We finally got the tickets into the machine and got our receipt. We walk to the room where the prize counter is. The door is locked and there is a sign on it that says "See attendant to unlock prize room" Well I'm already about to have a meltdown at this point, so I told my nephew that I had to buy something from the bookstore.{This would give one of the other people time to see the door is locked and ask the attendant to unlock the door!} We walked to the bookstore for absolutely no reason whatsoever other than for me to feel like a fool for having anxiety over something so silly lolll. My nephew is asking me the whole way, why we couldn't get his prize.

So anyway, finally after a pointless walk through the bookstore, we went back and he got his prize. LOLLL....I just feel so silly sometimes.

Ok so I've got some friends, when I come to think of it it's more of a social circle that I got caught in somehow. Well most of these friends now have girlfriends and of course kids... And that has impacted the time (which was limited) that I've spent socializing with my friends. Now a number of them are moving away to different towns and I'm losing touch with them.

I'm not mad or angry at them for having a life and a family. I'm more frustrated with myself. I should be at the same level as they are. I'm 26 years old and a single drunken one nighter a few years back is the only thing I've got to show for. I feel like I didn't take part or didn't use the opportunities better, that is to ask for help or guidance from these friends while i had the chance. I might be less socially awkward today if I'd just gone more out with them or hung out more often with them. They might have helped me overcome this thing...or at least dampen it.

I feel like I've thrown away and wasted an opportunity. They where the only ones who'd drag me out on a night on the town or to those hellish things called parties...Many of them met their girlfriends through each others social network. I feel like I've blown it. Might have had the chance to make more friends...

Damn I feel lonely tonight...

I hate phones!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can totally relate to this. I think you've described what goes through a social phobic's mind really well, and illustrated how our behaviour to others, can sometimes appear quite mysterious.

Ok...so my sister invited one of my cousins to spend the night at my house...

I hate when people come over cause it makes my 'safe place' unsafe...

so she tried talking to me and said "I haven't talked to you in so long!"....and she even said "Well I know you never talk, but you know what I mean"
and I just sat there and managed to get only a few words out...I always make a fool out of myself and I hate it!
now I'm sweating..I could tell my face was getting red....and I'm breathing deeper...I suck at conversations!
Why is it so hard for me to talk to people?
this happened like 15-20 minutes ago by the way...and I'm still anxious!...

Yeah I've been in that situation alot of times Joe, I'm the same
Why do people feel like they HAVE to try and talk to anybody who is quiet?
Maybe we don't want to talk, leave us alone

Maybe a idea for the Ofear store? "I'm quiet because I don't want to talk to you!"

I agree...that's why I usually avoid them if possible..

and I'd wear that shirt....

Well...okay...it's rant time..

OK...So a while back I promised one of my old friends (on myspace), that I'd teach him how to play guitar.. ...I've since deleted my old myspace, so yeah...I thought that whole thing was over...This was months ago by the way, like last November/Decemberish.. That's how long I've been avoiding the whole situation.. Well anyways, he's actually my uncles girlfriends little brother ..So whenever he's bumps into my parents at a family get together or something, He'll ask if I'm still gonna teach him...

I have no idea why I said yes..well anyways, he called today..and surprisingly enough, I actually answered the phone, which I usually would NOT do.. and actually talked normally. So that was kind of cool

He asked me if I was still gonna teach him how to play guitar...and I said "uhhhhh..uh..uh...I guess so "...I don't want to teach him! I can't play guitar when people are watching me, plus I'm not at all good at teaching people stuff, especially guitar...The only reason I said yes, is because it would of been kind of dumb to say "no, I can't teach you..sorry" ...So I had no choice! ...I seriously hope he doesn't drop by one of these days! Please no!